It's been a very interesting month. So much has changed in our household, and much of it is drama! But it's all working itself out. We are becoming a family. Slowly. As we find our new "norm". Much of the past week I've been walking around sulking about all these medical issues I did not anticipate. Issues that will(and have) effected the whole family in some way. Issues we didn't sign up for...blah blah blah. Gosh, that is so bad, selfish, mean, wicked, ungodly, etc etc etc. I'm tired. But God. He is Good, Selfless, pure, perfect, and my strength when I'm weak. Oh Holy Spirit come! Come! ...and He did. and continues to be my strength in these momentary flesh talks I have with myself-He sets me straight. When I put it all in perspective - it's God that led us to this. It's God who gave us a new daughter. It's God who created her to be our child and knew her name before the beginning of time. God. He made the path clear and opened the door wide for her to be here. God.
So much is changing in her too, it's exciting to see! Really, sometimes I can't contain myself when I see her exuberance! What a delightful kid she can be.
I will go on but first I want to share Easter with you...Arielle's first! It was exciting. I found the Jesus Movie for Children and had her watch it in Mandarin. Daddy sat with her and they talked after (well, aided by google translate.) She heard the Gospel in Guangzhou when we were there last month. At least part of it, but I know that most of this is totally new to her. She gets excited about church too...
Then it was time for the boys to get Arielle up...she likes her Ladybug :) In fact, All 3 sleep with them nightly.
Gosh it was a long, but really nice day! And Arielle's first Easter. She loves being with family. She loves her family. And I see her trusting us more and more each day. Back to what I was saying before...
I've been trying to figure out all these med problems-problems I had no idea about, and how to keep this girl healthy. While keeping my other 2 healthy. How am I ever going to do this?! Another special needs kid who needs multiple docs and daily medical care...what the heck! And she doesn't speak English, do you realize how difficult that is to prepare her for these appointments?
Then I remembered something. Evan. Before we adopted him, his file opened wrong on the computer and we lost the page that told us his tumor was growing back. Had we known this, would we have looked the other way? It turned out to be wrong information.
Then I remembered something else. Asher. We were never told he had sickle cell. That was not revealed until he came home...I suspected it but...well...would we have looked the other way if in the very beginning we knew?
If we knew about these issues, we would have missed out on these beautiful children. They have so much potential and make our house a home. We love them to pieces! We would have missed this! These moments are so precious, a treasure. I see Arielle coming to life everyday. Growing and mature, and excited about Church! She doesn't fully understand, does she? She asked me twice tonight, "church tomorrow?" (youth group) Yes, church tomorrow. And that's what's exciting to me! She is hearing the name of Jesus. If we had known the truth about her, would we have looked the other way? We would have missed out on treasure more valuable than diamonds or gold.
These kids are mine. Well, really they are His. But I get to have them now. I'm choosing to see what's real and eternal. I'm choosing to see what blessing I'm given each day I wake up to these smiles. I have a choice, and I'm choosing to live for Him. As she color eggs, learns to ride a bike, and speak English, God imparts his TRUTH to me every day as I watch her... His plan is perfect. period.